Life is wild.

Life has been crazy lately. I am starting to feel a little bit better so that's a plus. Last night Brad and I were talking and he suggested that maybe all of the problems wrong with me health wise are actually just a reflection of all of the bad things I put into my body growing up, so pretty much this is all my fault. I think he's right.

So a series of events has made me think a lot about life, my past, and my future. My sister has really been struggleing lately adn then this weekend a close friend of hers commited suicide. I hate that I cant be there to comfort her but I can always pray that things will get better. I cant imagine how he must have been feeling to be to the point of taking his own life, especially a week before graduation. His poor family.

I almost feel guilty with everything going on that I am so excited and wrapped up in Brad and I's relationship, But then I think...that is my future. I already went through crap in my past and pain and hardship so I deserve to be happy now. I deserve to be able to rejoice about where I am and where I am going. This is the best time of my life.

It is really difficuly living with these conflicting emotions sometimes but that's life I suppose.

I am going to start writing a book again. I think it might be good for me. I think I am going to write a biography of sorts but with some changes here and there so it isnt completly my story.. I think it will be a good way to take on this new chapter of my life.

I am so excited for the day I can stop keeping my big secret to myself and I can tell the whole world...but not yet. :)

Brad and I went with his roomates to a Beatles tribute band called: 1963 The Tribute. It was a ton of fun! After the show there was fireworks too. Overall just a really goofd night. Here is a picture and video from the concert.